Look. I made it back to my blog. Well, you know, 2020, amirite? Let's look at what's been on my mind. 👩🏻💻 February 10th The reason why, or if you want to know, or if you're curious about how it feels to be stabilized on medication for bipolar disorder, and after finally having worked with … Continue reading Level 33 🎂
I last relapsed 5 days short of a year, and now I've made it to 11 months. I've been trying this for 5 years. Let's not do that again. Alcoholism is lonely. Triggers are temporary. Understand that with bipolar disorder, more than half develop a substance abuse disorder, and if I want to shut off … Continue reading Don’t interrupt the process
I have come so far and I'm finally able to really own my progress. I'm proud of Carrie. I stay away from booze, and if I slipped it was for a very brief period. I'm a month and a half away from a YEAR again. I'm still alive. I came very close to taking myself … Continue reading Bipolar in order
I can't believe I made it to the other side; I've reached stability. It's kind of surreal. I have accepted that I'll have bipolar disorder for the rest of my life, but as long as I am able to keep up this treatment regimen and as long as I keep staying away from alcohol I … Continue reading To everything there is a season
25 Signs and Symptoms Of Bipolar Disorder From True Activist (Note: I took the opportunity to edit this article for my blog format so readers do not have to put up with a hundred advertisements and the annoying slideshow) The ability of people to function productively and cope effectively with the rigors of daily life … Continue reading 25 Signs And Symptoms Of Bipolar Disorder (from True Activist)
“When you first possess me, I thrive. I’m at my best and in my element. All shadows of doubt and depression, of loneliness and weariness fade away. I am reborn, reincarnated, reinvigorated. I am a newer and better self. This is the self that they love. Come, sweet Mania, and revive the dormant self within me that is begging to get out.”
I can sense you long before your arrival. You send secret messages to me taunting me with your distant presence as you inch toward me. Like a sultry lover you take your time, teasing me, flirting with me, sending sweet thrills through my body and mind before dissipating into the night once more.
I know you are there, simmering away, gathering heat and energy, gathering momentum before exploding into my being, overwhelming me and possessing me. Even though I sensed you coming, it still always takes me by surprise once your iron grip tightens around my mind, squeezing out every last essence of my sense and judgement. I still feel shocked when I catch myself in thoughts and acts that you orchestrated, making me perform like your puppet, your plaything.
I crave the reckless abandon. I long for the freedom, the vigor, the sexuality. I yearn for the…
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https://youtu.be/1LE0LPBnFfg "Hypomania (literally "under mania" or "less than mania") is a mood state characterized by persistent disinhibition and mood elevation (euphoria), with behavior that is noticeably different from the person's typical behavior when in a non-depressed state. It may involve irritability, but less severely than full mania. According to DSM-5 criteria, hypomania is distinct from … Continue reading Hypomania: Personal anecdotes
The last time I saw my therapist, I was talking to her about fragmentation, how there are fragments of myself, subpersonalities that aren't integrated, and she suggested this article about addiction and the Internal Family System. A recent and widespread subpersonality method is Internal Family Systems therapy (IFS therapy), developed by Richard C. Schwartz. He … Continue reading Managers, Firefighters, Exiles, and the Self
Signs and symptoms Bipolar Disorder is a condition in which people experience abnormally elevated (manic or hypomanic) and, in many cases, abnormally depressed states for periods in a way that interferes with functioning. Not everyone's symptoms are the same, and there is no simple physiological test to co.nfirm the disorder. Bipolar Disorder can appear to … Continue reading A comprehensive understanding of Bipolar Disorder
I think I exhausted myself somehow painting at the class tonight, because I'm having a mood decline and there's not much I can do about it except try some Klonopin I've stocked up on. Bipolar Disorder just takes you wherever the f it wants to. My body aches. It's so intrusive. I think one of … Continue reading Dealing with a triggering world